What Muslim Women Really Want In The Bedroom

Under the new law, women who wear face-covering Muslim veils in ‘public places’ in France face being fined £125 or ordered to follow citizenship classes, or both

s*x is taboo subject for most Muslims. However, a growing number of young Muslim women are talking about what they really want when in the bedroom. Shelina Janmohamed, author of Love in a Headscarf, explains how women are leading the way in her faith when it comes to understanding se*uality.
Abdelaziz Aouragh runs an online s*x shop for Muslims. “We don’t sell products that simply enhance the love life between man and woman,” he explains. “All of our products provide a deeper meaning to se*uality, sensuality and even spirituality.”
His company El Asira, based in the Netherlands, offers products like “sensual silicone” and “glamour lotion.” All of his products are Halal.
“The majority of our customers are women,” he tells me. “With men there is too much bravado.”
I see this pattern often repeated of Muslim women leading their male counterparts in the discussion about se*uality and intimacy.
According to Islamic law, s*x is limited to between those who are married. But when it comes to exactly what you can do, and how s*x is generally discussed, Islam itself is quite open. s*x is of course for procreation, but it’s also for pleasure.
There are stories about how Prophet Muhammad would be approached in the mosque by women and men asking open questions about se*uality. In one famous tale, a woman came to see him on her wedding night, to complain her husband was too busy praying and hadn’t come near her. The Prophet went to see the husband, admonished him for being too engrossed in religious prayer and instructed him to, erm, pay more attention to his bride.
This openness has been lost over time, and discussions about s*x have become taboo. However, things are slowly changing.
Wedad Lootah is a UAE marriage counsellor who published an Arabic s*x guide, Top Secret: s*xual Guidance for Married Couples, on how to achieve s*xual intimacy with your partner, stating couples needed the advice. Her book was blessed by the mufti of the UAE. But she received intense criticism.
Wedad Lootah’s controversial book
Whilst engaged, my now husband and I attended a ‘pre-marriage’ seminar, one of the first of its kind in the UK. The one day training included an hour about s*x. It wasn’t very good, but nonetheless, I was pleased that the subject was raised and the taboo broken.
Jenny is an Irish Muslim organising a similar two part seminar for young women only, the first on marriage, the second on intimacy. “The girls don’t know what should be happening in their intimate lives,” she explains. “The men tell them to do X or Y, and they don’t know any better.” Jenny understands that her seminar is unusual, but her primary concern is that the young women receive this education, and criticism is kept at bay. For this reason, she asks I don’t quote her real name: “I’m sticking my neck out here.”

It’s not a s*x instruction class that she’ll be hosting. “We’re not telling them what goes where!” laughs Jenny. “But these girls need to know their rights in the bedroom.”
In the USA, controversial Muslim activist Asra Nomani has written an “Islamic Bill of Rights for Women in the Bedroom.” to ‘uphold women’s right to pleasure”. Nomani says she received negative feedback about the bill. But when I read about it I remember thinking, this is not in the least controversial or new for Islam. If anything it shows how little Muslims – even vocal ones – have knowledge about Islam’s un-guilty approach to s*x, or understand that Islam has always been extremely open about s*xual pleasure, and in particular women’s pleasure.
Yet, it’s undeniable that to talk about se*uality, especially as a woman, is difficult, and as a consequence I’m genuinely apprehensive about publishing this piece. But push on I will.
It’s a subject that needs to be openly addressed, precisely so that these contradictions can be unravelled.
There is a lack of research about the existing levels of s*xual knowledge among Muslims. How much do they know? Where do they gain their knowledge? And perhaps the most difficult to ask: what is the reality of how they conduct their s*xual lives?
A new chick-lit novel about to be published in the UK is called No s*x and The City and features a Muslim heroine. And last year in the US, an anthology of true courtship stories written by Muslim women was published delightfully entitled Love, Inshallah (God willing). Amongst the narratives there were those that were sexually explicit and spoke about s*x both inside and outside marriage. Whilst the book itself was extremely popular, its comparatively graphic nature drew positive feedback as well as criticism. But the more important point of both books is that Muslim women themselves are trying to open a discussion about se*uality, its role in their identity, and their fears and aspirations.
For those Muslims who want to live a chaste life, the pressures are immense. Our surroundings are notoriously sexualised. Virginity is seen as freakish. And rejection of ‘s*xual liberation’ is seen as backward. For teen Muslims, these challenges must be particularly difficult.
If contextually appropriate teachings are not available – whether at home, in the mosque or in other social settings – then the taboos about se*uality become entrenched, lead to diminished knowledge, and pleasure or even negativity about s*x.
So where should a young (or even old!) Muslim turn to for s*xual teachings that they feel are in line with an Islamic perspective. Courses like the one being run by Jenny are few and far between. And those willing to discuss matters openly are equally rare.
And to even begin such discussions, what is needed is a healthy dose of facing up to the fact that how Muslims live their lives is not necessarily the same as the Islamic ideals they aspire to.
A famous Islamic traditional teaching about s*xual pleasure says that when God created desire, He made it into ten parts. He gave nine parts to women, and just one to men. So it’s no wonder women are leaving men behind when it comes to trying to better understand their se*uality, as well as the relationship between their se*uality and their faith.

Shocking Story: Human Parts Dealer Goes Insane

Doose Nomhwange left home one morning, unaware that danger lurked ahead. Her friend of many years lured her to a man who traded in human parts. But fate pulled a fast one on her captor who, on the verge of killing her, became mad. Call it a demonstration of power between the forces of light and darkness in which the former roundly won.

Read the heartrending account of how this middle-aged widow went to hell and came back alive to tell her story.
Unforgettable Day
I had lived in Lagos where I had all my kids. But later, I lost my husband. Some time ago, I went back to Lagos to find what to do to take care of my two sets of twins. I was a full-time housewife when I had my children. I intended going back to school to further my education but my husband, an Ogoni, from Rivers State, stopped me because I was too young, and we agreed that I could go back to school when I finished having my babies. But later, things became tough because my husband was a businessman.
When he died, I had to return to Benue State because I was the firstborn of my parents and I didn’t want to take my children to Rivers State because Benue has more food. So, I returned to Lagos, and that was when I met a man. He owns an oil and gas company (name withheld) and he employed me personally as a marketer, canvassing for people who would buy oil, diesel, fuel and all that.
On this fateful day, I went to see my father who was ill and on admission at the University College Hospital (UCH), Ibadan. There was something they needed for my father’s treatment and they didn’t have it in Ibadan. So, they wrote it down for me to buy and I went to Boluke Pharmacy on Awolowo Way in Ikeja. As soon as I walked out from the pharmacy because I lived at Ojodu Berger, I saw Aisha, a lady I had met long ago at the office of my cousin who was a stylist and we became friends.
The lady is from Igbira in Kogi State. She wanted us to talk about a supply contract she had. I suggested that we sat in an eatery on Allen Avenue, but she said there was a new eatery on Toyin Street where we could talk. There was a young man by her side that she introduced to me as her fiancé, adding that they were going to wed in two months’. We jumped into the young man’s car and they assured me that from the eatery, they would take the expressway, drop me and then go back to Ogba. When we got to that place, the man horned and the gate was opened. We saw a lot of cars outside because it was an estate. Inside the house, people sat with their girlfriends, drinking and eating. I didn’t know that they were members of a satanic group. My friend drank beer and after apologizing that she had no money to buy me wine, she gave me water.
Evil chief
At a stage, a man gorgeously dressed in native attire (names withheld), came in and walked to our table. A lot of them got up and greeted him. I also got up and greeted him. After a glance at me, he asked why I was not drinking and he bought Campari for me. He opened the bottle and I took a glass and because nobody was interested, I dropped the bottle in my bag.
After my discussion with the lady, I waited for them to drop me off as earlier agreed but the young man said he wanted to ease himself but never came back. After about 10 minutes, the lady, left in search of her fiancé, leaving her bag behind. After a long wait, I became worried and told the barman that I was leaving. As I walked towards the gate, the gateman shut it.
The chief shows up
When I turned, I saw the gorgeously dressed man walking towards the gate. I thanked him for the entertainment and told I was leaving. The man said: “Do you know who you are talking to? You are an idiot! Common, shut up! Don’t you know I am a chief?” Later, he said in Yoruba: “Omo Oba”, and some young men including two that looked like bouncers came. On his orders, they collected my handset and handbag, and took me upstairs.
So, they took me upstairs and flung me into one room and shut the door. Inside the room, I saw many clothes, bags and more than 1000 SIM cards. About 15 minutes later, the man appeared and ordered me to, “pull off everything and drop it there”, and I obeyed.
Unconscious
By then, I was no longer in full control of my senses. Before he came up, I prayed that if the man had been killing people, I should not be his victim. As a Christian, I understand that there is power in the tongue and I declared, “Right now as I sit here, let the blood of Jesus take over before they think about anything. I worship with Living Faith.
They removed my earrings
About seven boys were at the man’s beck and call. He didn’t touch you; all he did was give orders. He came back as I was still putting on my pants and brassiere and said: “Are you stupid? I said anything that represents a material on your body should be taken away. Why are you still with all these?” So, I removed everything and they took me to the next room and locked me up. Throughout that night, they jubilated and drank. Apparently, due to the glass of Campari that I took, I was very tired and having cried and prayed for long, I became weak, and slept off.
Angels to the rescue
I slept until 3am and that was when I regained consciousness and realized I was in a strange place. I prayed till after 4am and at about 5 am, the man came into the room and asked me, “Are you a witch?” and I said, “No sir.” Then, he said: “What have I done to you that you beat me all night long, and didn’t allow me to sleep?” It was a strange question for me to answer. I begged and told him that I had no strength to fight. He said, “shut up”, and slapped me.
You see, I strongly believe that this incident happened in order for me to believe in the power of God because I didn’t believe in miracles. When people said they received miracles, I just looked at them with disdain. But this time, I became a personal testimony. I begged the man and he started beating me. The way he punched me, if God was not by my side, even if I escaped, I would have died or needed a lot of money to fix my bones. But for each blow he hit me, I felt nothing. Each time he hit, and I shouted, “Jesus”, I felt as if someone had touched an empty carton. Then, he said if I had any prayer, I should pray because he was seriously going to work on me. He said he had worked on so many people by removing their private parts, eyes, tongues and other vital organs.
House of death
He told me that no one came to the house and escaped. Honestly, that house was designed for killing people. If God was not by your side, you can never escape from that house. Most times, the boys were downstairs drinking and smoking.
I socialized with them by asking for cigarette hoping that if I did what they were doing, they would set me free. If I requested for cigarette they would quickly bring cigarette for me. One day, I requested for food and they said in Yoruba that after all, it was my last food. It was rice and meat but I couldn’t eat it.
Day Two
On the second day, the boys argued among themselves in Yoruba and I could pick some meaning. They said: “Ah, kilode? Se this thing wey oga bring no be wahala o. We don tell oga make e leave her, make i go because oga no dey waste time. Anybody wey dem bring come na one day. One day don pass, two days don pass and still we don’t even know what the shrine is saying.” They consult a shrine to know a victim’s worth.

Day Three
On the third day, the man came to me and said: “What kind of hairstyle is this (I had a hairstyle called fishtail)? This hair is the one tormenting you. You are a very nice person. This hair is what is tormenting you. Don’t panic, they will remove this hair style, so that you can be free.”
They called me Samson
I heard them say in Yoruba, “Samson ni o”, that may be, I am Samson in the Bible. They suspected that they couldn’t kill me because I have the same powers as the biblical Samson. They threw a bedcover to me and told me to tie it so that they could take me downstairs.
The house was very large and people lived in the boys’ quarters with their families apparently, without knowing what the man did. Or maybe they knew but were scared? So, they took me downstairs to cut my hairs and as I stepped down, I saw that the gate was opened and then a Mallam pushed in a wheelbarrow with kegs of water. He was their barber but he came with water so that people would think he hawked water. As soon as they came in, some people started emptying the water inside the gutter and thereafter, they returned the gallons to the wheelbarrow and took me near the swimming pool, and I kept praying.
One good thing was that at that point, my faith had risen by 100 per cent and I knew for sure that I was not going to die because the Lord was with me. They made me sit on a chair by the swimming pool and the Mallam cut all my hair and dropped them on the ground. As he dropped the hair, I found out that in the past, some hairs were burnt on that spot. After cutting my hair, he shaved my head with a razor blade.
I don’t understand Hausa but on that day, this Spirit came upon me and I spoke Hausa to the Mallam. I asked him whether that was what the man does to people and he said I should not worry, that the man was a nice man, that he would give me money to go when I am ready to go. I asked why the haircut but before I could get an answer, the evil chief came out of the house and the Mallam quickly shut me up. By this time, more than 12 of the boys had surrounded me, watching as my hair was being cut. Later, they brought a small bowl containing some concoction.
I think they chanted some incantations inside it before the man said: “See, they have cut your hair; you can imagine how beautiful you look. Drink a little of this water, use the remaining to wash your head and go upstairs. I will give you your clothes to wear and then you will go home.” I dipped my hands inside that water and said, “God, because the blood of Jesus Christ supercedes every other blood and that is the only currency that binds everywhere in the world, let this currency in the blood of Jesus Christ buy my life now.” I prayed within my heart.
They ordered me to hurry up and do what they asked me to do. So, I drank a little of the liquid and washed my hair. They brought something like a detergent and said: “Wash your head very well. That is what is tormenting you.” After washing my hair, I sensed that I was about going mad, and they freed me. Maybe they wanted to make me mad. They told me to go upstairs, may be, to know if I could know the way out. I almost missed the way to the staircase because it was as if someone’s fingers were inside my brain.
By this time, I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. I shouted: “Jesus! I rebuke this madness in your name because you were never mad, so, I cannot be mad.” I said it loudly and they gave me a slap on my back calling me an idiot and warned me not to mention that name there. Upstairs, they kept another water in the bathroom of the room that I stayed before they moved me to the one was that looked like the master room.
There was a large cupboard where he kept his tools for operating on people. They then asked me to bathe with the water that also had some concoction. As soon as I got into that bathroom praying, the Holy Spirit ministered to me that I should throw away that water. I did so and prayed that the water should flow fast before they come.
This was about 6pm, I thought of what else I could do to convince them that I had had my bath. Then, another voice told me: “Ease yourself inside this container and use your urine to rob your body. In fact, bless that urine to be the blood of Jesus Christ and use it to rub your body and don’t dry up so that it will look as if you took your bath (there was a towel in that bathroom). When they come, they will think you have had your bath.” And because I had not eaten and drank, my urine was very little. But God gave me the grace.
Then I prayed into it and quickly rubbed it on my body and the remaining one, I sprinkled on his picture and everywhere. This time, I prayed and cried. So, before they came I had returned the bowl. The man looked at me, shook his head and left. After about an hour, he came back and said: “Who are you? Are you a witch? Why are you so difficult? And then he made a call. They have doctors. They had everybody.
By this hour, he told me bluntly that he had not killed me through poison because he was going to use my kidney to make more money. He would send my kidney for transplant while my body would be sold. He got angry and immediately called his doctor on the phone. He called one doctor James who now answered and he asked when he was going to come around because it appeared he was not on duty. Then, they fixed an appointment.
Miracle on Day four
On the fourth day, I didn’t know what their shrine said because my prayer was that when they go to that shrine, they should see the blood of Jesus Christ. I was sure they couldn’t consult because on this day, the man stormed that place in anger. He just opened the drawer and removed a shiny knife, showed it to me and said that anywhere the knife touched me, I would not live till the next day.
He was still talking when something strange happened. Suddenly, I saw the man fling off the knife, rolled on the ground, hit his head and ran out of the room. I wondered what must have happened to him. He came back later shouting, “Fire, fire”, increased the air conditioner and jumped into the bathroom, and started bathing. After bathing, he came, stood under the air conditioner, calling those boys but they were scared to come.
He would call, “Omo Oba” and they would answer and he would say, “Where are you? You are just saying sir, sir, without coming.” When they came, he told them to hold me but none of them came closer to me because at that stage, there was tension and they had not seen such a scenario before.
The man screamed and at a point, he held me by the neck demanding that I must quench the fire that was burning him. Then I told him: “Well, the only way that fire must be quenched is to allow me go. If you don’t allow me go, the fire has not yet started.” He said he would not give up, adding that he had never been defeated in his life. He mentioned his names (withheld) and titles to me and told me he would not allow me go because he would die if he did.
By this time, I began to praise God for visiting me and each time I shut my eyes, I saw angels surrounding me. At a point, the man knelt before me and asked: “Which God do you worship?” I told him that, “I worship Jehovah Almighty God, through His only begotten son that He gave for my sake, Jesus.” After this man had confessed, he and his boys ran away.
But I could not leave because the room they kept me had a burglary proof designed in such a way that if it is hooked outside, you can’t open it from within. I prayed, “God, I know that you have given me victory. But you need to do more. Someone needs to open this door for me to go out.” At about 10pm, the young man whom Aisha claimed was her fiancé appeared and opened the door for me. I gathered later that when the man found out that everybody had run out with him, he contacted him because he brought me and Aisha. In deed, the man threatened to kill him if he failed to take me away. So, the young man had no choice but to come and open the door for me.”
Surprisingly, he asked: “What did chief say you have done to him to deserve all these?” He threw his pyjamas to me and said: ‘Wear it; let me take you to the balcony. When people are asleep, I will open the gate for you to go.” At about 10pm, he left and never came back. At about 4am, as I was asleep, I heard a voice say, “Wake up. It is time”, and I jumped up.
I thought of using the pyjamas as a rope to climb down but as I pulled my clothes, I turned to my left and saw a strong pipe. Then I crossed my leg to the wall and holding the pipe, I climbed down the building. The maiguard was still there. Sensing that the maiguard was asleep, I climbed a nearby tree and crossed the fence to the other side, even though the security iron cut me on my stomach. At about 5 am, the gates were opened and I saw cars passing.
I walked to the expressway and stopped a motorcycle but the man looked at me as if I was mad and didn’t stop. I stopped three others but it was the fourth one that pitied me after hearing how I escaped death. He dropped me somewhere and gave me N50 with which I boarded a vehicle to Ojodu Berger. The conductor tried to stop me from boarding the bus, seeing the way I was, but I shoved him aside and with the backing of other passengers, I entered. When I eventually got home, my girlfriend rushed me to St Timothy’s Hospital at Ojodu where I was treated. Even at that, I was ill for months.
Source: The Sun

Why I Sang At First Lady’s Rally – Yinka Ayefele

Nigerian gospel musician, Yinka Ayefele is one of the most sought after gospel act.
In a recent interview, Yinka bares it all. He talks about his marriage, his education and the accident that landed him on a wheel chair as a result of spinal cord injury.
Yinka was one of the major entertainers at the elaborate dinner party held by Patience Jonathan sometime in August. He therefore, cleared the air on why he sang at the first lady’s rally in Abuja and his relationship with her.
According to him, it’s his profession, so he can’t reject an invitation to perform and entertain.
He also denied granting any interview where he said ‘he is challenging those who still don’t believe that he can perform to come with their sisters to prove the point’. He called it rumour.

Malala Meets Queen Elizabeth At Buckingham Palace

Malala Yousafzai continues her journey with world elites after surviving an assassination attempt by the Taliban. She spoke to the Queen about the importance of education when they met at Buckingham Palace.
The 16-year-old was shot in the head in Pakistan last October after campaigning for the right of girls to go to school without fear, in a part of the country where Islamic fundamentalists were trying to impose a strict form of Sharia law.
Malala was one of the guests at a reception for commonwealth, youth and education hosted by the Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh on Friday.
She was reduced to laughter by a comment from the Duke, who quipped that in the UK, people want children to go to school to get them out of the house. Malala covered her face while in a fit of giggles at his joke.
The teenager, accompanied by her father Ziauddin, gave the Queen a copy of her book, I Am Malala, during their meeting in the palace’s White Drawing Room, telling her: “It is a great honour for me to be here, and I wanted to present you with this book.”
Accepting the gift, the Queen replied: “That’s very kind of you.”
Malala told the Queen she was passionate about every child having a right to an education, everywhere around the world.

She added: “Especially in this country as well.
“I have heard about many children that can’t go to school, and I want to continue our work.”
Ziauddin Yousafzai also spoke to the Queen and Duke about their past visits to his home country.
Malala was flown from Pakistan to the UK for emergency treatment after the attack. Surgeons who treated her said she came within inches of death when the bullet grazed her brain in the attack on a school bus.
She was treated at Queen Elizabeth Hospital in Birmingham and has now settled in the city with her family. Since the attack, she has addressed the United Nations and been nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize. She also recently met US President Barrack Obama and his wife at the White House.
Princess Beatrice and the Duke and Duchess of Gloucester were also present at the reception, attended by 350 guests from academic institutions around the world.
It included a performance from the Commonwealth Youth Orchestra and choir.

Saudi Arabia Rejects UN Security Council Seat

Saudi Arabia said on Friday it was declining its United Nations Security Council rotating seat, citing “double standards” that made it hard for the saying the 15-member body to end conflict and wars.
“The kingdom sees that the method and work mechanism and the double standards in the Security Council prevent it from properly shouldering its responsibilities towards world peace,” the foreign ministry said in a statement carried by state news agency SPA.
This, the ministry said, enabled Syrian President Bashar Assad’s regime to perpetrate the killings of its people, including with chemical weapons, without facing any punishment.

The kingdom, which has backed the Syrian rebels in their struggle to topple Assad, has in the past criticised the international community for failing to halt the civil war in Syria, now in its third year.
It said it was unable to take its seat until reforms were introduced, but did not specify what reforms it wanted.
The highly coveted 15-member Security Council seats includes five permanent members with veto power – the US, Russia, China, Britain and France – and 10 nonpermanent members elected for two-year terms.

SHOCKING: Nigerian Girl, 13, Confesses How Dad, His Friend, Kept defiling Her for 7 Years

A 13-year-old girl has made some shocking confessions on how her biological father, Stephen Chimaraobi, and his friend, Paul Oha, defiled her for seven years in their Ojodu home in Lagos State.

The police at Grammar School Division, Ojodu, conducted immediate arrest upon hearing this story.
42-year-old Chimaraobi, from Delta State, has remained single after his wife left him. His friend Oha, from Imo State, is married and has two kids.
The girl narrated that the she was defiled at the age of six years and regular defiling continued till she became 13, without each of them knowing until she reported the matter to the police.
She said she did not know the damage they were doing to her until recently, as she became an emotional wreck.
The victim further narrated that her father did not re-marry after the girl’s mother left him and he took advantage of her mother’s absence to r*pe the child repeatedly.
The little girl said she was helpless because her father threatened to kill her, if the girl made this fact public.
She also adder her father’s friend Oha was also engaged in frequent s*xual assaults. He used to come to their house at odd time, when her father had gone to work.
She said after that, he would warn her not to tell anyone about it, including her father.

“My father’s friend after abusing me, will ask me not to tell my father, not knowing that my father was also abusing me,” she told the police.
The victim decided to risk and went to the police to report the matter when the trauma became unbearable.
Chimaraobi’s neighbours confirmed the incident and condemned his arrest, adding the police should ensure that the victim get justice.
The father and his friend were charged with defilement and r*pe at the Family Court in Ikeja, on September 18, 2013, Wednesday.
The case has been adjourned till November, 6, 2013, while the suspects were remanded in Kirikiri Prisons.

Girl Drugged And Defiled By Man She Met On face book.

She claims she met the man on Facebook and both arranged for a friendly date after one month of lovey dovey inbox messages.

 

The man picked her up in a Range rover car and drove to upmarket westlands for a drink. She decided to have red bull since that was their first time of meeting and didn’t want to leave a bad impression.

During their date, she excused herself and went to the loo, that was when the man drugged the red bull she was drinking.

The girl only remembers being drowsy and someone dragging her to the car. She was half awake but still weak when the man together with other assailants defiled her repeatedly. She lost count of the number of times she was defiled.

She only came back to her senses when good samaritans found her in Umoja 2, Kenya in a very bad state.

The girl said her v**ina was sore and couldn’t walk properly.

She warns females to be very careful about the male friends they meet on Facebook as not all of them have good intentions.